Joke!

So,

My Crush Calculator trick worked! Pretty funny stuff...

The results:

Men lie about their crushes on the computer.
So do women, just in a different way.

Here is an example of what I saw that men would write:

Angelina Jolie
Tyra Banks
Tara Ried

But every single woman (8) who responded wrote their present boyfriend, fiancee, or husband. (Even my fiancee wrote that...)

That's not who a "crush" is... the men are more realistic.

Either that, or all of my friends know that I'm not to be trusted because I'm sneaky. (I'm guessing that's probably it).

Recipe

As many of you may know, I have had a number of successes with women because of my cooking. Now that I am no long in pursuit of a woman (or women for that matter), I feel that it would be a waste of my time if I didn’t have the opportunity to share some of my knowledge (that, I might add, was given to me graciously when I was out of high school by a good friend of mine). I have some friend that cannot cook to save her life, and apparently has ended up in tears over the matter (don't worry, I'm sure he still loves you even though you can't cook). I hope this guides you well.

Fettuccini Alfredo

(Tagline: “The Alfredo that will make you want to kiss me... only your breath would stink so bad that I wouldn’t kiss you.”)

Ingredients:

¼ Cup of Butter
2-6 Cloves of Fresh Garlic (you can never have enough garlic)
½ Pint of Whipping Cream (the equivalent of 50 ml, small box)
½ Cup of FRESH Parmesan Cheese, finely graded. (A mincer works well).
Pinch of Nutmeg
Pinch of Salt
Pinch of Pepper
Pasta (I have no idea how to measure pasta, I normally just eyeball it. Sorry, can’t help you with that one…)

Directions:

Crush the garlic with a garlic crusher. Melt the Butter with the garlic in a sauce pan on medium heat. (HINT: Put the garlic on the butter so that it doesn’t burn! Keep stirring until all of the butter has melted and begins to boil. Then add the cream. Keep the heat at medium heat and stir occasionally. The butter and the cream will not blend together until the sauce boils. Once it starts to boil, reduce it to low heat and start to slowly add the parmesan cheese. (HINT: Grab small amounts of cheese and sprinkle into the sauce between your fingers, then stir the cheese into the sauce. If you do it too quickly, the cheese will ball up in the sauce.) I never add the same amount of cheese, I just add until it tastes good.

Add some pepper, and a dash of salt. You don’t need much salt for this recipe. The pepper I tend to add a little more, just because that’s the way I do it. Then add about three quick pinches of nutmeg. (I don’t know what the difference is between a quick pinch and a slow pinch, but I feel that a slow pinch just wouldn’t taste quite right). I sometimes add more, it really adds flavour.

Once all that is done, then add it to your pasta. Cooking pasta is pretty straight forward, but I’ll give you one quick tip. If you are not sure when the pasta is done, bit it and then look along where you bit. If it isn’t ready, it will have a raw centre. Continue to bite the pasta until it’s cooked all the way through, because I don’t know the method of determining if you’ve overcooked the pasta.

Another pasta hint: When you strain the pasta, DO NOT WASH THE PASTA. REALLY REALLY BAD HABIT TO GET INTO. It washed out the flavour and makes the pasta “icky.”


There you go, this is the recipe that I used many a time to impress girls when we met. Ironically enough, I didn’t have to use this method of seduction for my Jackie, she loves me without stomache manipulation. :)

p.s. There are countless ways to spice up this recipe, here are my favourites:
Chicken
Shrimp (fried or boiled) (I have a great recipe for shrimp cocktail by the way)
Chunks of honey ham.

Or my favourite:

Throw in a Portabella mushroom. The key to a portabella mushroom is to buy a whole one, (not one that is prechopped). Then take a spoon and clean off the gills. The gills are sometimes bitter so it is better to just be rid of them.

Crush Calculator

This is a very cool site! Check it out.

Good Times, good times!

It's Saturday after a night of drunken stupidness with my buddy Scotty K. It's his bachelor party today, and we came up to Calgary... We went to the good ol' hoochie bars, like Cowboys, Wiskey, there were some others but I can't really remember, I am not really in the position to recall exactly what occured last night...

My intent this morning was to write lots on this blog, but I do not have the time at the moment. I spent too much time reading other people's Blogs (Yes Flannery, I was reading your blog and I will comment shortly) and now the boys are up so we must do some fun stuff. Maybe we'll knit and drink tea.

yeah, that's it alright

Random Spam

Could Anyone shed light as to the point of someone sending me spam like this?


From: Teija Daggett [daggett@anything-xtreme.com]

Subject: ouuyce

long it would be before Dain could reach the Lonely Mountain, if he had
set out as soon as the message reached him. But Bilbos heart fell, both
at the song and the talk: they sounded much too warlike. The next


Like really! It doesn't even advertise or anything... is this just to see if the email address is real? what the hell?

Update

I have been Uber busy lately, so you have to excuse my absence. But I have noticed that my loyal readers are still coming back looking for an update, so I’ll try to fit one in between labs.

Well, work has been ridiculous, school is damn near done, the wedding is creeping up on us, things are progressing at light speed.

Jackie and I have bought a house back home. With me working back here now, it saves the driving and all the gas I’m putting in the truck. I didn’t mind the drive before, but when Jackie and I move in together, I don’t want to have to lose an extra hour to come home and see my wife. The long hours that I’m putting in are hard enough to deal with, I don’t want to make Jackie deal with an extra 2 or so hours a day that I put in just by driving to and from work.

My last university class is going quite well. I just got my midterm marks back and I got an 81%. (note: My next post is going to describe the idiocy of Athabasca University and the examination centre). I also finished my term assignment and I got a 90% in that as well. I’m going to plug away to get it done in the next couple of weeks, (hopefully I’ll be done by July 31) then I’ll be done university forever! Yay! I have found myself contemplating going back to school for shits in giggles, maybe going back to play football, but I can’t see myself doing it.

I might, during the Wintertime, go get my Accounting diploma through SIAST (which I am about half completed with my Economics degree now…), but that won’t happen until I have a very good handle on running the company and it’s finances.

Woah, way off track there. Where was I? I spent this last weekend in Winnipeg with Jackie, we met the priest, got engagement photos taken (I’ll post a couple when we get them back) and picked the photographer for the wedding. It was a very good weekend. I also attended the matrimony of two very good friends of mine. It was a wonderful wedding, I cut up rug like you’ve never seen (swing dancing rocks) and saw some people I haven’t seen in a long time. Good times had by all.

There are lots of really good posts that I would love to write about, but I have a feeling that most of them are going to be Winter Posts, because as you can tell, between planning a wedding, running a company, finishing my BA, attending 5 more weddings and some bachelor parties, it is going to be a full year!

Godspeed!